Pregnant With A Capital PEE

I have to pee ALL THE TIME.

I know that all of the making babies manuals will tell you that you will have to pee all of the time, but what they don’t do is spray paint FIND A TOILET AND GET COMFORTABLE on the side of your house, which is what they should do. That MIGHT be enough to get the point across. Seriously, I think about peeing about twenty nine hours a day (which I think is a talent) and it’s making me go a little mental.

As a girl who’s been prone to UTIs she was 18, when I feel that urge to pee I RUN to the nearest washroom and take care of things immediately. If you’ve ever had a UTI before then you’ll understand the fear of ever contracting one again. If you haven’t had one before, then try to imagine peeing straight razors & being shot in the stomach. That’s ALMOST how painful it feels & now that I feel like I have to pee all the time, I’m not only annoyed, but terrified of the UTI possibility. I had one around week six and it was miserable for about ten days while the milder dose of antibiotics that are safe for pregnant women took their sweet freaking time. I do not want another trip to the ER, even if we do have a fancy, newly built hospital.

Seriously, this peeing thing has got to calm down.

Take this evening for example: I peed when I got home from work & again about twenty minutes later. As soon as I stood up from peeing the second time I PEED AGAIN. About ten minutes later when my neighbor came by to go grocery shopping with me I felt like I had to pee again -- by then I knew my body was just a goddamn liar, but I humored it and sat down to try again. Nope, nothing. It FELT like I have to pee but there is nothing going on down there.

It is getting to be exasperating.

The entire time I was at the grocery store I felt like I needed to pee, which I think might actually be enough to drive a pregnant lady OVER THE EDGE (and we’re already so close at times). When I got home from shopping I peed twice within the span of thirty minutes.

I also figured this must be costing me a fortune in toilet paper so I’ve switched to a generic brand. Let’s not talk about how sad this makes me & my girly parts. I’ve also stopped flushing the toilet every time for fear that I’m causing some sort of water shortage on my block or perhaps the ENTIRE DOWNTOWN AREA.



Did any of you feel this crazy about having to pee all the time? I mean, it would be fine if I really had to pee and was rewarded every time I sat down with that screwed up look on my face with the tap running, trying so desperately to do SOMETHING -- but this, this is borderline insanity.