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26 July 2009


Last night Gretchen stayed home with daddy so I could go out and celebrate a friend's birthday. It was the second night I've been out without them since she was born and, amazingly enough, two of my friends who are mamas were also able to get out sans children. It was quite the sight for all three of us to be away while the little one's were with their daddies.

I stayed out for a few hours, and came home to a sound asleep babe. Ryan did a fabulous job. My little girl had been asleep for a couple hours and he didn't have a problem getting her to go to bed.

Balance has always been the attachment parenting principle that I've struggled the most with. Gretchen still wants to breastfeed every hour or two, so sometimes it's hard to feel as though she can get along without me. Though I'm still not eager to leave her with anyone, I'm starting to feel more comfortable with the idea.

For example: as you all know, we are moving on Tuesday. My close friend (whose wedding I'm in next month) has volunteered to take Gretchen for the morning so that I don't have to worry about her while we pack up the UHaul. She will be the first person (other than the gym daycare provider) to watch Gretchen who isn't related: however, she's in my chosen family and I trust her wholeheartedly.

It's little steps like this that I know will create a healthy balance in my parenting style.

Little by little.

I am doing better with leaving her, but I'm always so happy to see her when I return -- and I love that feeling of seeing her little face light up when she sees me.

There is nothing like that.



Blogger lililly said...

I leave baby with Simon every day to go to work and although ive been doing this near on 3 months its still hard.

Outside of work though? I think we have left him with someone else only once! and that was for about an hour or two. So really you are doing way better than me! :D

July 26, 2009 at 5:54 PM  
Blogger Desiree Fawn said...

It'll get better and better -- you're so strong to be able to leave for work. I'm just a suck :(

July 26, 2009 at 8:37 PM  
Blogger m a m a :: m i l i e u said...

balance is a thing hardly ever achieved once kids enter the household--at least, i think. however, it's super important to always try and find it anyway.

my little guy is over 7 months old and i have only left him with daddy for a few mornings here and there and it IS so very hard. i'll just have to keep on trying and know that with time it'll get easier and easier.

July 28, 2009 at 11:31 PM  
Blogger sarah said...

Are you going back to work too?
I start again in two weeks. I've been off since March.

Freaking out!

I have a good sitter, right by the high school where I teach, so I can go over on my lunch and breastfeed. Nonetheless, I do not want to leave Lucia at all. That being said, however, I really don't have a choice.

I'm feeling rather down about it right now.

July 30, 2009 at 10:48 PM  
Blogger Desiree Fawn said...

Sarah: I don't have a set time that I'll be going back to work. I'm doing a little freelance writing from home, but mostly I'm enjoying (meager) maternity benefits for the year.
I would absolutely be losing my mind if I had to find a full time sitter for her any time soon -- I hope you can find someone fabulous!
It's so hard to trust someone else to be with your child that much, but with research and persistence I believe you'll be able to find someone who has at least a common mindset and who will respect your wishes as a mother.
Much love & best wishes!!

July 30, 2009 at 10:53 PM  

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