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12 April 2009

Advice For Mamas & Mamas To Be

A little while ago I asked my fellow tweeters to e-mail me with their advice for mothers & mothers to be. Today I want to share some of the wisdom that they passed on to me. Here are a few snippets from their responses with a few of my own mixed in:

01. Don't try to be a super mom -- being a regular mom is good enough.
02. If something works for you and your baby, and it is neither rude nor dangerous, then you do it, no matter how many protests from busybodies and shocked looks from your friends that you get. (It is so important to do what feels right for the both of you.)
03. You can never have enough: facecloths, wraps, blankets, diapers, towels, socks or onesies.
04. If you have a boy -- remember to point his equipment down when changing his diaper.
05. Ask for help, even if you don't think you need it. You can only play the mama-martyr for so long. Besides, motherhood was never meant to be a solo sport. (I often have a hard time with this one.)
06. Sleep. Nap. Close your eyes. Put your head on the kitchen table. Do whatever you can to recharge your batteries, even if it's just in ten minute spurts. (So important!)
07. Don't become a hermit. Maintain contact with the outside world. Babies are portable, whether you carry them next to your body, take them for a ride in your stroller, or take them on a journey across town by bus or car. You'll both arrive home refreshed and energized by the change of scene. (Gretchen & I walk downtown & back almost everyday. It makes me feel like a part of the world & is great for getting a little exercise!)
08. If someone offers to help you with your dishes, laundry, cleaning your bathroom etc. they generally mean it & aren't just asking to be nice. Let them do it, or let them hold your baby while you do it. Either way you'll feel better.
09. Never underestimate the rejuvenating power or a warm coffee or tea.
10. Wear your baby -- you can get so much more accomplished with your hands free & it's really great for babies & toddlers alike. (Gretchen could be the spokesbaby for babywearing -- we're getting really good at it.)
11. Don't blame yourself if your baby is crying & you can't help them to stop. You are doing the best you can & that is what matters. (You're a fabulous mother -- remind yourself of this daily.)

This is nowhere close to being an exhaustive list, but it's a start.

In addition to these wise words, here are a few fabulous posts that I have enjoyed so far:
01. Before I Was a Mom
02. On Momversation: Why Do You Care How I Parent My Child?
03. Gentle Baby and Toddler Sleep Tips
04. What No One Tells a First Time Mom
05. First Few Weeks at Home with your New Baby
06. Top Ten Things to Do When You're Pregnant
07. 10 Daily Survival Tips for Moms
08. 1o Things All New Parents Should Know

So there you have it, some genuine advice, some laughs & some kick ass mothering wisdom. I hope you can all take away some positive things from this post.

Please feel free to share your own advice or favourite posts in the comments.


Thank you to Kate, Raye & Ann for their contributions.

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Blogger thewindhover said...

Though I don't have any advice as a first hand mother; I have have both a brilliant mum and a love for children. Watching your journey into the great unknown has been more inspiring than I can really explain here; you have affirmed many things I have always felt on the subject; and I know when I do make my journey into motherhood it will be bearing so much of this in mind! Bless you Fawn for sharing your thoughts and your two great lovesx

April 13, 2009 at 2:13 AM  
Blogger Catherine said...

Hi! Came across your blog through the 31DBBB Challenge. Nice list post ;) and loved having a read through your blog in general. Great to read another mummy/mommy blog on the challenge circuit! Keep up the great work. Cath (http://mysquiggles.com)

April 13, 2009 at 7:28 AM  
Blogger Desiree Fawn said...

the wind hover: gosh! this is so flattering & I am SO happy to share these tales with everyone! also, I hope when you are ready to be a mother that you will share it all with us as well :)

catherine: hello & merci!! also, I am trying to get together like minded mom/family/life bloggers together who are working on the 31DBBB. I will e-mail you about this :)

April 13, 2009 at 9:57 AM  
Blogger PhD in said...

Great post and thank you for linking to my post on gentle sleep. I also wrote a little list of things all new parents should know:


April 13, 2009 at 12:29 PM  
Blogger Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog said...

Best advice I can give is to abandon the silly hang-ups we all tend to focus upon. Drop the preconceptions you have about what you "should be" doing and just DO what feels right. Life is so fleeting and youth is merely a flicker of a candle. You can't appreciate a candle's subtle glow if you're running around in circles, flashing searchlights for the "Right way" to do everything.

April 13, 2009 at 7:19 PM  
Blogger Laura Em said...

I also found your blog through the 31DBBB challenge. This was a great post! I love discovering blogs like this. Great work.
- Laura

April 13, 2009 at 9:51 PM  
Blogger Desiree Fawn said...

phd: I've added your post to the list! thank you for sharing :)

tracey: that is SO true what you said about what we "should" be doing -- it's so easy to freak out about that! I know I have -- you have to do what is right for you and your family and THAT is the bottom line!

laura: hello & welcome! thank you for stopping by my blog -- I'll be sure to check yours out as well! I hope your journey with 31dbbb is going well!

April 13, 2009 at 11:10 PM  
Blogger Elaine said...

I'm not a mommy yet, but know that when I am I will definitely be turning to your list and links...actually I'm enjoying reading through them now!

April 15, 2009 at 11:46 AM  

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